I’d take a day at this park over a day at the spa – every time. Look at that view!!

Not to mention Dog #1 and Dog #2 think this place is … hmm.  I don’t even know if I can come up with the right string of words.  Imagine a bunch of exciting and awesome exclamations – put them together and Voila! you know what Dog #1 and #2 think about this park.

We (more like ME) might arrive at the park with a lot on our (more like my) minds but as soon as we get on the field everything is forgotten.

I was TOTALLY going to write a blog today about how it seems I’m ALWAYS eating my words. And you know what?  THEY DON’T TASTE GOOD!

But THEN Anonymous (which has to be the absolute WORST blog name ever and so I’m going to change it to Robin Hood) showed me this wicked cool, awesome to infinity, angels singing AHHHH!!!!!-mazing site:

http://www.incredibox.com/en/#/application

(don’t forget to like them on FB!  https://www.facebook.com/incredibox.official)

I wasted a LOT of time playing on this website.  No. Strike that!! I wasted a LOT of time playing on this website. It wasn’t a waste. it was be pure fun. *HUGE SMILE*

PURE FUN!

Which is more than I can say for Homeslice, about whom I SAID had a heart bigger than his deep rooted inner douche but then *cough* *GAG* *gasp* *omgosh I can’t breathe* yeah – that’s what happened.  I choked on my words over the weekend.  I’m surprised I lived to tell about it.  THANKFULLY I have good helping dose of dignity and it gave me the Heimlich Maneuver.

BUT it was a close call.

Until the next post,

~K. Pete

Queue the drama.

Do you ever wonder if the stuff you see in movies actually works?  Like taking a long piping hot shower, where steam practically chokes you, to wash away the memories of the day? Well… I bet you could NEVER ever in a bajillion years guess what I am about to say.

I TRIED IT! and it kinda works!!  You see, when the water is burning your skin you stop thinking about anything except, ‘AH!!! WHAT THE HECK? HOT! HOT! HOT! ” and then you turn down the heat because bright pink skin is NOT really an attractive look.

And while you’re finishing your hot, but not burning, shower, you wonder if there are other movie cliches you could try, in fact, maybe you should just do your own dramatic movie cliche mythbusting blog series. Wouldn’t that be great!?  But as you’re brainstorming more dramatic movie cliches you worry this conversation you are having with yourself could be considered alarming and you reflect on what this says about the state of your life (7734) and THEN omgosh this is a really really long sentence *deep breath!* THAT’S when you realize that you haven’t thought about Queen Douche who would be the King of Douches but in the Land of Douchebaggery being king is kinda what they’re going for so Queen it is, AT ALL!! except for the fact that thinking about NOT thinking about him kind of qualifies AS thinking about him – but again – why are you even thinking about this? Turn up the heat again. “HOT! HOT! HOT!”

YAY!

Maybe there really IS something to these cliches.  ;)

Hmm.  Final Conclusion? I get bored really easily and if mythbusting cliches is even mildly entertaining – I might as well do it. I can’t WAIT to come up with my next one.

Ok so we might not share taste in music Scott Pete, Alexis or Mom BUT you ought to check out this video.  :)  Five people playing one guitar and it’s AAAHHH!!!!-mazing. Plus the lyrics – well – Story of my life eh?

“Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
But had me believing it was always something that I’d done” “You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end, always the end”

Gotye Feat. Kimbra Cover by Walk Off the Earth
“Somebody That I Used to Know”

Oh and fun Daisyland trivia – I introduced my blog to Gotye with this picture below back in August of 2009..

And in this incredibly well written, detailed and thought provoking blog in which, just as the title explains, I truly do not have anything to say. “Pics of the Day – not much else to say”

The song I had on repeat that day?  ”My Heart’s a Mess” by Gotye

Remember the time I said I was going to teach the world to sing?  And I was so excited and dedicated?  But instead of teach I said blog about stress reduction because I can’t sing?  And then I only wrote like 3 blogs about it?

Or what about the time I said I was going to take a self-portrait every single day for a year but ended up only doing it for about 90 days?  Yeah… umm… about that.

In other news, I was super pleased and excited to learn that the kids I teach in church adore me.  YAY!  Happy days!

If you set it free and it comes back to you, does that mean it’s yours to keep?  What if you’re the one who flew away?  If it’s there when you’re ready to come home – can you stay forever?

BOOM!

OOORRRR maybe it’s not quite like that.  It’s more like this

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!

What??  Changing long time personal habits can be kind of a slow process!!!!

hahahaha.  But what if all of those fears you had before – you know – the ones that made you doubt what he said? the ones that made you scared to risk your heart? well, what if you were wrong?

What does this all mean?  I’m not sure either.  I only know that:

 ”No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other’s worth.” – Robert Southey

Happy New Year!  Has it really been a year?  So much has happened!!! Yet we pick up, almost, as if nothing has… and here we are – same holiday, same time, same place.  We laugh.  Is it possible?

Yes.

I couldn’t wait another day.

“Life is full of sweet surprises, every day’s a gift.
The sun comes up and I can feel it lift my spirit.
Fills me up with laughter, fills me up with song
I look into the eyes of love and know that I belong

Bless us all, who gather here
The loving family I hold dear
No place on earth, compares with home
And every path will bring me back from where I roam.

Bless us all, that as we live
We always comfort and forgive
We have so much that we can share
With those in need, we see around us everywhere

Let us always love each other, Lead us to the light
Let us hear the voice of reason, singing in the night
Let us run from anger and catch us when we fall
Teach us in our dreams and please, yes please
Bless us one and all

Bless us all with playful years
With noisy games and joyful tears
We reach for you and we stand tall
And in our prayers and dreams
We ask you, bless us all

We reach for you and we stand tall
And in our prayers and dreams we ask you
Bless us all”  ~The Muppets Christmas Carol

I wish you all a very merry and happy holiday season!!

It’s kind of trippy to see Katy Perry as a senior citizen. It’s also kind of trippy when someone from your past starts haunting your thoughts. Want to know what ELSE is ALSO trippy??  Too bad.  I’m going to tell you anyway.  :)  It’s ALSO trippy when you realize they never left your thoughts, you just couldn’t entertain those thoughts until now.

AAANNNDDD I seriously watch WAY too much ghost whisperer because I thought “Katy Perry has a ghost!!!! Better call Melinda Gordon STAT!” when I saw the end of this video.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ok so maybe I didn’t really think THAT exactly. but I DID think GHOST WHISPERER when he went to touch her hand.

I heart me some tourist for shizzle.   I heart me that song too. *happy sigh*  Did anyone else fall in love with this plot and movie? And has anyone else gone back to an old cell phone record/bill in order to find a number they deleted so that they could UN-delete it?

WHAT?? Who said that I did that? You must be craaaazzeee. I meant like “anyone else” as in like anyone besides the any ONE person who MIGHT have done that and who probably ONLY did that because the owner of said number deleted his OR her facebook account but who definitely wasn’t me – umm – yeah. haha. Because ME, MYSELF AND I?? I only went back to the cell phone record to CONFIRM that the number sitting in the “trash” of my verizon wireless back-up assistant was the number I really WAS looking for. haha. (which btw – I didn’t even KNOW Verizon kept my trashed numbers until tonight!!! can I get another “craaaaazzeeeee” please? cuz that is CRAAAAAAAZZEEEE! good news.) hahahaha!!!!

So yeah… It felt pretty stalkerish to go back and look up a number in the past. But it’s late – I’m tired – I’m feeling a touch loopy and yeah – YAY – yeah – I did what had to be du-du-du-done. Pound Pound PEACE!

“We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” – E. E. Cummings

He did that for me.

We have got to stop meeting like this.  Late at night.  Too tired to think straight.  Eating a dark chocolate orange ball. *SMACK!  SMACK!* That’s the sound of my Terry’s Dark Chocolate Orange, as always, splitting into perfect pieces.  *happy sigh*

It wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to realize J-doo-da and I broke up.  Who’s J-doo-da?  Oh, you know, just the guy that I was dating this past year. My big mistake AND the inspiration for my new break-up playlist.  YAY!!!

haha!!

“There’s a side of you that I never knew .. and the things you said they were never true.”

AAANNNDDD let’s be honest, “I kind of always knew I’d end up your ex-girlfriend.” though I DO wonder… ”Why’d you have to go and pick me? When you KNEW that we were different COMPLETELY!! … but I should have thought about that before we kissed..” haha!  Oh Gwen – you rock.

And we ALL know that “I can’t stand the restrictions. I find myself trying to change you, if you were meant to be my lover I wouldn’t have to…” *gasp!*

“Easy come, Easy go, that’s just how you live, take take take it all but you never give. Should have known you were trouble from the first kiss… ”

Wait a minute – Bruno Mars did you read my journal??

“Black Black, Black and Blue, beat me til I’m numb. Tell the devil I say “Hey” when you get back from where you’re from… ”

“There’s a fire starting in my heart, Reaching a fever pitch, it’s bringing me out of the dark, FINALLY I can see you crystal clear, Go ahead and sell me out and I’ll lay your shit bare, See how I’ll leave with every piece of you, Don’t underestimate the things that I will do.  … The scars of your love remind me of us, they keep me thinking that we almost had it all. You had my heart and soul inside of your hands but you played it to the beat.”

*sigh* I love music!!!!  AAANNNDDD being FREE has given me a renewed sense of self, a liberating freedom, tons of Holiday candy and an exquisitely SMACKED Terry’s DARK Chocolate orange.  Hip hip hooray!

Oh and I also found the courage and desire to get back on track with ME.

ME!!!!!

I’ve missed me.  ”I don’t know what I’ve done, or if I like what I’ve begun.  But something told me to run and honey, you know me, it’s ALL or NONE.  There were little voices whispering that I should go and this should end… cuz I don’t know who I am without you, but all I know is that I should…”

I’m FREE!!! I can be MYSELF. I won’t get texts telling me to delete my FB statuses or please take down pictures anymore. I won’t have someone adjusting the sleeves on my shirt to make sure I’m “proper and modest” and I can laugh at what I want, smile at whomever I want, and be the fun flirtatious girl I used to be.

And yes – I told him I wish I could erase him from my memory. But that was a touch dramatic. haha!

It’s still going to take some time … I’ve been in a slump for months (long before we broke up) and I need to reignite my passion. I need to stop this pattern of behavior. The song above “scar” – oh it’s so me. And this blog is part of my healing process. YAY!  I’m getting closer to being ME again every single day. I have AMAZING friends!!! And I’m meeting so many great people!!

“He left a card and a bar of soap with a scrubbing brush next to a note, That said “use these down to your bones”.
And before I knew I had shiny skin and it felt easy being clean like him, I thought “this one knows better than I do”

A triangle trying to squeeze through a circle…
He tried to cut me so I’d fit”

Sure, “My mind has eff-ed me over more times than any guy could ever know…” and “Maybe I should give up giving …” and “I’m sorry to whichever man should meet my sorry state, watch my steady lonesome gate and be aware…” BUT I will recover.

And I will look forward to being the happy carefree woman I once was, again, very soon. I have hope. And I’m excited to be ME again.

“I always take the high road and I always bite my tongue and say you’re right.  I never say just what I think for fear that you can’t handle it.  But tonight?  I can’t hold back, I’m breaking out of the gates and screaming, ‘Give me back my voice again! Give me back my soul!  Give me back my love again, I want to give it to someone else.”  I will not be calm, I won’t be nice.  Now all that time I wasted is time I’m making up – and it’s mine.  I’m not so scared of what I want, there’s a freedom in just being me. Sick of trying to make it easy. I’m on my own and I’m finally breathing. ‘Give me back my voice again! Give me back my soul!  Give me back my love again, I want to give it to someone else.”